There was an instance when I knew that this place is fucked up beyond words to describe. And this US election result reinstates my thoughts.
This is not even a safe place for women to have an opinion let alone walking around at night.
This is not a safe place for women where a high percentage of men still have the perception that men are better than women in many ways especially in workforce and still act like a misogynistic prick and think that’s okay.
It’s not a safe place when many people still disregard the issue of sexism and gender inequality and still believe that it simply is a myth that women created to demand for more than what they are “entitled” to be rather than an actual issue.
It’s not a safe place when we still create different bubbles for our son and daughter to live in. One is to dream big with sky is the limit and the other one is to live under the glass ceiling.
This is not a safe place for women when parents still only preach their daughters to cover up their bodies worrying of people’s judgement and not teaching everyone to not cast random judgement.
This is not a safe place for women when we still expect certain stereotypical roles from each gender.
This is not a safe place for women when women who go out late at night are all labelled bad girls and when men who go out late at night are considered cool or say that “men are just being men.”
It’s not a safe place when women are so regularly subjected to sexual harassment and abuse, but of the cases are turned blind-eye and minimalise its effects by the society.
It’s not a safe place when women are subject to catcalling every day and every time she walks down the street, despite however she dresses or when people in the society think that catcalling is a way to compliment women and praise her beauty.
It’s not a safe place when women are too scared to report any harassment or assault and have to succumb to the same abuse the rest of her life because people would tell her “You can’t talk about it because it would damage your reputation.”
It’s not a safe place for women when women don’t even protect other fellow women. When a female supervisor would ignore your sexual harassment complaint citing you overdramatise and overreact over the situation and that it could have [it could have] been just a tease from the male counterpart. That’s the moment when you know you are fucked to be in such a dangerous place for women, that there’s no safe exit you can run to, that there’s no one to report your case to, and there’s no one even willing to listen to your story. There are only people who will instantly judge you for dressing too “provocatively”.
It’s not a safe place when men openly and braggingly talk about sexual assault or force women to have sex opposing their consent because such act is considered to be acceptable or brand as a “boy talk” or “boy thing” to do.
This is not a safe place when parents allow their boys to attack little girls at playground citing that “he can’t handle her cuteness.”
It’s not a safe place when such act has been normalized and accepted into our society that turns against women and make this a dangerous place for women to be a part of literally and metaphorically.
It’s not a safe place when men instead of discouraging and condemning another man’s behavior of abuse and mistreatment towards women but praise and join in on the act.
It’s not a safe place when ignorance toward sexual abuse exists by turning a blind-eye towards abuse, to think that abuse is a myth, to brand certain behaviors as appropriate for certain gender, or to call it a locker room talk.
This is not a fucking safe place when children grow up in a household to witness where the father still abuses the mother. This is not a fucking safe place when your son grows up to mirror your behaviour and think it is OKAY to lay your hands on women or treat women with an utmost disrespect.
This is not a safe place when you can throw jokes here at there on social media about how girls are expected to look a certain way (slim, slender, petite and in shape) and pray men who have belly as a product of beer consumption as “men will be men.”
It’s not a safe place when on social media, we joke about the value of women (dowry) and attach a different price tag to women of different age groups.
It’s not a safe place for women when we label women as “girlfriend type, a wifey type, a concubine type, karaoke girl type” based on how they dress, when men can be seen walking around flashing their beer belly with only a krama around their waist and that is common.
It’s not a safe place for women when gender privilege plays a big role in how each gender plays out in the eye of the public.
It’s not a safe play for women when education has to be selectively chosen to give to your children based on their genders.
It’s a disgraceful and dangerous place for women!